Most of the times I’ve answered this I answered half-heartedly (not at all honest and fully). The reason is, I unknowingly didn’t realize I didn’t know what this meant or entailed. I truly thought I meant it when I said I was coachable. When my coach asked me a question I answered with what I thought was the right answer then I waited for her to agree and or tell me I was wrong and tell me the correct answer. Of course, this isn’t at all the way she was coaching, but this was what I was listening for.
I was not even close to being coachable. So, let’s look at some key points in what NOT being coachable looks like.
- Being defensive when you’re being confronted about a behavior that is hindering your growth. This can be your refusal to abandon the reasons why you react a certain way and being unwilling to even consider a different way of being, due to your attachment to it. Really, that’s all that is, but we will address that in a future post.
- Agreeing just to move the conversation along. (I mean, I can’t tell you how many times I unknowingly did this.)
- Get direction and agree to take action and do certain things, without the intention to do it until the very last-minute, if at all.
- Act like you understand (even though you don’t), or worse, act like you don’t get it when really you just don’t want to try.
Now let’s go into what being coachable does look like…
- Being open and able to listen to feedback from another person.
- Having integrity and completing the tasks and assignments given.
- Giving up your need to be right!
- Being open and honest about what it is you’re feeling and allowing whatever is there to come up.
- The willingness to work through any blockages with an open mind and trust that your coach is guiding you to discovery.
As you can see being open is a big part of being coachable. This involves being vulnerable and allowing yourself to consider another possible way of being and another way of perceiving any situation. Being coachable is about awareness and gaining new tools, and using them to your advantage. It means opening space for the possibility that there is something you still have yet to learn and there are things you don’t know you don’t know. These are called blind spots and you won’t get a glimpse of them if you’re closed off and cynical.
Coaching will help you overcome obstacles and open space to get creative and express yourself. You’ll gain insight on what it is you truly desire and pinpoint what it is that is stunting your growth, and ultimately your success. Coaching is future-focused, yet helps you to become more present. Each coach has a passion for helping people with all of this and more — they are some of the most focused and selfless individuals that I have met, and I strongly recommend that everyone find one to work with. I wouldn’t be where I am if it weren’t for mine (and I can’t emphasize this enough). I am now completely and utterly coachable in all areas in my life, and because of it I learn so much more from everyone, everyday.
P.S to my first coach I am sorry I was so difficult! Thanks for sticking it through. @brandilyn_tebo